The art of not giving a (blank)

Tuesday, June 11, 2019

The art of not giving a (blank). 
I left it blank on purpose so you can insert anything you want. Whatever you are feeling right now. Just to be clear, I haven’t read the book yet, this is purely speaking from my personal feelings.

I thought of writing this post for the longest time but I just couldn’t find the motivation to do so. I was really inspired after a long talk with a close friend of mine. I felt the need to pen down this thoughts so I can look back in the future.

I think one of my biggest lessons in 2018 was that I cared too much, I took everything very personal, even when it doesn’t deserve any attention. It made me easily bothered by a lot of things, I was really beaten down multiple times. I bet some of you find it very hard to not overthink and let go of certain matters, don’t worry, I struggle for a very long time too.

I mean this trick of not giving any (blank) wasn’t discovered just today, it was something that people around me kept advising me to do so but I was just so stubborn. I felt like it was really unhealthy and it has taken a toll on my mental and physical health. I felt like shit for the longest time, now that I’m looking back, it was definitely not worth it.

So about this art, it works wonders. It works on love, family, friends, work, basically everything. I’ve finally learned and it made my life much easier, I’ve been much more free and easy. I’ve managed to walk away from so many toxic situations that I may have dwelled for a few days in the past. I’ve made my own choice not to listen to the voice inside my head or let the monster take control of me. It wasn’t instantaneous, I took a long time to adapt to it but I’m glad it works for me now.

How to start? Here are 2 simple baby steps to take;

i) Accept that some things are out of your control

Sometimes, no matter how hard we try, people would not like whatever you do. People will have their own opinions about you, will draw their own conclusions, they won’t understand you like you want them to. It’s normal. Just accept that there is nothing you can do to change their mindset, you can’t change these situations. Even if they are misunderstandings, don’t fight for closure, don’t ask for explanations, don’t chase for answers. You just have to let go.

I’m also slowly learning that life is better when you don’t center it on what’s happening and the people around you.

ii) Loving yourself more

Like RuPaul always say “If you don’t love yourself, how you gonna love somebody else”. It’s your life, you make your own decisions.

It’s recognizing the things you don’t like about your life and finding the courage to change them. It’s walking away from situations where you are not happy. It’s signing up for classes you are excited about. It’s standing up for yourself and knowing when is it worth your fights. It’s following your heart, making your own decisions.

There are times when people will try to talk you out of some decisions and you are worried that the outcome, it’s not bad taking a leap of faith, you might be surprised.

x x x

And step by step, we will slowly understand that life isn’t that bad. If we just give less (blanks) about stupid things, we will be happier.

If you are feeling the same I felt, you are still struggling to let go of the littlest things in life, your emotions or feelings, just know you can do it as well. And when you really let go of these unnecessary undeserving situations that are out of our control, you’ll be free.

I hope this piece may bring some sort of hope to whoever is reading it. Choose you, your own self. 

With love, 

Instagram | Facebook | Twitter | Pinterest

Instagram: @carolyntay

© • Beauty, Travel, Lifestyle Platform. Design by Fearne.